Confession time: promo makes me feel cheap and dirty

oh god
oh god

I guess this actually isn’t much of a confession; I have yet to meet a writer who genuinely enjoys the business of trying to sell the thing they’ve put all this time and effort into creating. I think most of us feel awkward about it at best, and at worst we feel that we’re actively assisting in the process of cheapening this Precious Child Of Inspiration that has sprung from the core of our Creative Soul, lo, as Athena springing fully grown from the head of Zeus.

But then I think a lot of it is also reticence borne of some  deep-seated insecurities. It sure as hell is with me. I can’t shake the feeling, no matter how much I do and how much evidence I find to the contrary, that I’m a writer of middling talent at best and most people could probably do better when it comes to their reading material. It’s hard for me to go out there and loudly insist that THIS IS A GOOD BOOK AND YOU SHOULD BUY IT. I mean… I think it’s good? I hope you buy it and like it? You may not? I dunno guys pretty much do what you want

In the case of Line and Orbit it’s also kind of insulting to my co-author to act this way, since I am in no state of doubt regarding her talents.

But as I’ve been plowing my way through L&O promotion the last couple weeks (LIKE I’M STILL TOTALLY GIVING AWAY FREE SHIT OVER HERE) I’ve been trying to reconcile myself to doing this and actually doing it with some conviction, because this thing ain’t gonna sell itself and I do happen to think it’s a pretty good book. So what I’ve been telling myself is that somewhere out there are people who actually really want to read Line and Orbit. They’ll love it. They are the audience. They will be happier, however slightly, for having this thing in their lives. But this won’t happen if they don’t know the book exists. So the task of promotion is to find those people and tell them that the book is there. I am helping to connect them with something they will enjoy. I am doing them a service.

I still feel kind of dirty, but maybe a little less so.

And but so, this is by lengthy way of saying that yes, I know, I have become that most wretched of creatures: An Author With A Book To Plug. I’m very sorry. Thank you for bearing with me. We’ll get through this together.

One thought on “Confession time: promo makes me feel cheap and dirty

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  1. A few weeks ago, I was sitting next to a guy on the 6 bus who struck up a conversation with me about writing and speculative fiction AND had a bunch of LGTB positive pins and stuff on his messenger bag (he works at Columbia and I STILL haven’t been able to find him again, which is a shame, I feel like we’d be able to have a lot of flaily conversations about lit) – ANYWAY. I told him I’d just sold my first book and it was WAY WAY WEIRD, WHAT?

    and he said, and I quote, “Makes you feel kinda dirty, doesn’t it? But a good dirty, right?”

    So, you’re not in it alone, mon ami. I’m right there with you.

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